It is a universal truth that toddlers are irrational beings. They cry for no apparent reason (or because you took away the banana that she said she did not want) have no clear sense of style, and wear their emotions on their sleeves. But they are also sponges – constantly learning and retaining information. While they are learning, they are also teaching. In the last month, here’s what my 2.5 year old has taught me:

Patience can be difficult. Yes, this is stating the obvious. When Clara wants something, she wants it now and everything is “today.” When did you first learn the concepts of “today”, “tomorrow”, “yesterday”, or “later”? Clara can grasp “today” and “tomorrow” but we are struggling on “later” or “tonight”. You must accept that things will not go as planned. While I have goals and my timeframe for accomplishing them, I must accept that I will reach them but I might not do it in my timeframe. I must accept the unknown timeframes and embrace those unknown concepts of “later”.

Sometimes you need to slow down to speed up. Hurrying does not always get you there faster. Our morning routine has changed. Instead of rushing Clara out of bed, we now do the slow wake-up. Mornings start with belly tickles, chats in her big girl bed, and a story (or two). By waking her up in a good mood, she’s happy to start the day and get ready for school. If we immediately start the “hurry up” talk, she starts the day in a bad mood and feels rushed. She fights and stops moving. The result: each method requires the same amount of time. The “extra” 15 minutes spent having fun with Clara isn’t really “extra” time. Without the belly tickles and fun parent time, it takes an “extra” 15 minutes to get out the door because we have a cranky and disagreeable child. In fact, the belly tickles may actually get her moving faster.

This lesson is universal. If you slow down and do things correctly the first time, you eliminate the extra time for corrections. I’m working hard to consistently do this at work and in other aspects of my life. Before I start a task, I will take a deep breath and accept that it will take time to complete. I’m not going to rush through and risk making mistakes.

Diversions and distractions can solve problems. “Hey look, it’s an airplane!” “Hey look, Molly [the dog] is dancing!” This is my typical response to tears without purpose. This tactic sometimes works as well. The goal is to change perspective. Stepping away for just 5 minutes can change the way a situation looks – and you can reevaluate and determine how best to handle.

 

It is okay to cry. Toddlers wear their emotions on their sleeves. They love completely and feel pain completely. Sometimes pain and disappointment can be too much and they need to let it go. This is true for adults. There are times when emotions are too much and need to be released. The cry (or laugh – whatever it is for you) gets the emotions out and allows you to move on.

 

Take time to connect with others – meet for tea or coffee. We recently started tea parties in my house. And let me tell you, they are AMAZING! I’m not seeking to do this with others. Meeting for tea/coffee can be easier than lunch. It can happen at different times during the day and/or not take as long as a lunch during a busy workday.

 

A real book is more satisfying than the tablet.  Books are amazing: they smell good, have texture (and sometimes pop-ups), are varying sizes, and have weight to them. They can have counting tools  and holes for your fingers. None of this can happen on a tablet. Enjoy a real book. Take notes in the book. Read the chapters out of order.

 

Exercise is important and can improve a bad mood. Sometimes you just need to run around. When the natives are restless, take them outside and let them run around. Recently, we had 5 toddlers at our house for a play date (moreso for the parents than the kids). When they got moody, we took them outside to the play area. All was cured. I’ve always known that I feel better after a run but never realized how important it is. Regular exercise is important to maintain stress levels and be happy.

 

Be curious. I wonder if I can fit in this container – I think I’ll try. Do things just to do them. See the joy in being silly. Not everything has to have a specific end. Sometimes the “end” is the enjoyment of the process – albeit a very silly process.

 

 

Give yourself small rewards everyday. We are in the midst of potty training. Finally, we are at the point of limited (if any) accidents during the day. I credit this improvement to the Frozen panties. I purchased Clara panties with the Frozen characters on them. She can only wear them if she is accident-free. Since she wants her Frozen panties, she keeps herself dry. I’m happier if I do this for myself. I now view an afternoon coffee as a treat for accomplishing certain tasks. It gives some excitement to the seemingly mundane.

 

Wear clothing that makes you happy. Accessories do not have to match your outfit perfectly. Pink cowboy boots go with everything. An animal print can match a pink hat and polka dot pants. At least, this is what Clara thinks. There is some truth in this. Grab the bag that makes you happy! (Maybe the monkey bag to the left isn’t the most professional option.) Use fun accessories – a scarf, shoes, etc. There are so many options. You can be professional without losing your individuality and personality.